By Adrienne Erin
Contributor, Online Career Tips
There’s a common misconception that introverts are incapable of managing or succeeding in social interactions. Introversion becomes tangled up and confused with shyness or rudeness, when the fact is it’s an entirely independent, inborn trait. Introverts are not incapable of succeeding in social settings; however, many introverts can fall into the trap of allowing new social situations to intimidate them.
Networking is a prime example of a social situation that has the potential to intimidate introverts. To overcome stressors and successfully navigate networking, it is imperative for introverts to plan ahead and play to their strengths. Here are a few key networking tips for introverts to keep in mind:
Be Prepared
Part of the stress of networking (especially networking at large events) for introverts comes from the potential to be put on the spot. If you have trouble initiating conversations, try doing a little prep work prior to the event. Prepare a list of questions that will instigate engaging conversations.
Stay away from yes or no questions; they’ll kill a conversation before it even gets started. Don’t ask, “Do you enjoy your work as a pediatrician?” Try asking, “What do you like best about work as a pediatrician?” Or, “what is the most challenging aspect of your job?” If they still keep their answer short, don’t be afraid to ask a tried and true follow up question: “why?”
Be sure to prepare answers as well. You don’t want to follow a script for every response you give, but you can help reduce anxiety by thinking about what anecdotes you might share or how you could relate a recent professional success.
Pick Quality Over Quantity
Don’t approach networking like a teenager creating their first Facebook account. Networking success is not awarded to the person who collects the most business cards—any more than long term happiness is secured by having the most Facebook friends.
Invest in a few substantial interactions rather than dozens of rushed or insincere elevator pitches. You are more likely to stand out in the memory of the person if you spend thirty minutes with them, less so if you come and go within thirty seconds.
Play to Your Strengths
Many people mistakenly believe that they have to push their way into conversations with the force and subtlety of a bulldozer. That may work in some cases but you don’t have to be socially aggressive to succeed.
Due to their reflective and empathetic natures, introverts tend to have exemplary listening skills. Rather than trying to imitate the brashness of extreme extroverts, try using your listening skills to your advantage. Make your contacts feel like the most important person in the room by giving them your full attention. Show that you’re listening by using one of their stories or a detail from a previous answer to pose a follow up question.
You can stand out by telling your best stories, but you can also shine by giving others the chance to share their best stories.
Use Your Imagination
Networking doesn’t just happen at large conferences or during organized networking banquets. Networking can happen anywhere.
Don’t restrict yourself to large crowds. Host an evening with three or four close friends, and invite them to bring new guests. With trusted friends as a buffer, it will be easier to get the ball rolling. Or try joining a club, team, or professional organization. Having a shared interest or goal will help break the ice.
Don’t write off an opportunity just because it doesn’t fit the stereotypical networking mold. It’s all about who you know, and, who knows, your grandfather’s roommate at the retirement home may be just the person you needed to meet.
Take Time to Recharge
Although extroverts recharge through social interaction, introverts recharge by taking time to be alone.
Know your threshold. If you know you need a day or two between big social events to recharge and regroup, try not to schedule three big events in as many days. If you’re already depleted before your networking opportunity has even begun, you’ve set yourself up for failure. Allow yourself time before and after an event to regroup, recharge and reflect on your experience.
Follow Up
In the process of asking open-ended questions and serving as a good listener, be sure to store away details that can serve as an avenue for follow up contact. Did you discuss a favorite speaker or author? Do you follow the same sports team? Did you discover you’ll both be attending a future event? Did part of your conversation get interrupted?
It doesn’t need to be complicated. Find a point to use as the basis of a follow-up email. It can be as simple as a quick note to say “thank you” for sharing their time or expertise. By making contact after the initial meeting, you’ll ensure that you stay in the forefront of their minds.
Networking isn’t one size fits all. If you’re an extrovert, network like an extrovert. If you’re an introvert, network by using your strengths as an introvert. It’s easier, more sincere, and more memorable to be yourself. Take the time to discover your strengths and then play to them.
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